Meet the Vinci Tab, a tablet for toddlers (yes, toddlers)Pop quiz: what’s the quickest, easiest way to calm a screaming infant? Easy: hand her an iPad.

Of course, the idea of letting an eager, adorable little toddler drool all over a $500 tablet—you know, the one with all your work email on it—might give even the most care-free moms and dads a moment of pause.

Enter the Vinci Tab, an Android-powered, baby-friendly tablet with a protective padded handle, a truckload of games and storybooks, and—perhaps best of all—no Internet access.

Available for pre-order on Amazon and slated to go on sale next week, the 1.28-pound, $389 Vinci Tab (which I’ve yet to see in person, by the way) boasts a seven-inch display, an interface designed for itty-bitty fingers, between four and six hours of battery life, and a sturdy shell made of “child-safe” materials.

Parents can expect a series of “age-specific” games and education apps pre-loaded onto the Vinci, and suitable for toddlers as young as … a mere 18 months. (Never too early to start, I guess.)

A key missing feature on the Vinci is wireless—meaning no potentially harmful Wi-Fi or 3G emissions, and no chance of your munchkin will run into any pop-up Viagra ads.

The Vinci also comes with a USB cable for transferring applications, music, and videos from your PC, along with an on-screen diary that lets you track your tyke’s development.

So, a tablet for toddlers … great idea? Nuts? Check out the video below (supplied by the company, not me) and let me know what you think!